Home for Christmas

It is early Christmas morning and all are still asleep. The light is soft and there is only the faint sound of wings fluttering, rejoicing the gift to the world, in the form of Mary's baby. Oh, how her heart must have felt that day! Every Mother knows that feeling... and no one can tell you how you will feel until it is your moment. The nurse places that child in your arms and you are complete.  You wonder at this miracle that God picked just for you and you question if you can be trusted with the responsibility.  I recall asking God about His decision, at that moment. What on Earth, did I know about any of this?  I was so scared and humbled at the task before me.  The nurse puts you in your car and you go home a family, ready or not.  I believe in Divine intervention.  Those two children in this picture are the result of God's ever lasting love. They are my special gift, and I am somehow deserving of these precious spirits.  Perhaps, they are "Angels unaware" sent to watch over me, instead of the other way around.  I am a blessed woman!

Expectations

This is the Season of Expectations. We are all waiting for something. We wait for the season to start and once it gets too hectic, for it to be over. Children expect Santa to bring them the items on their list on Christmas morning. Parents expect their children to dance with joy and love their gifts. The merchants expect this seasons profits to keep them solvent  for the months to come.  Mothers expect Hallmark moments around the family gathering dinner table with picture perfect food and design.  We all have expectations of just how this season should play out.... the best ever, perfect, appreciated, loved, and paid for.  I loath expectations, personally. I have been know for avoiding people and the expectations that relationships bring. Even friendships are a little treacherous for me.  I fear I will not be able to live up to other's expectations or demands and somehow let them down.  This season brings people and relatives a little too close for my comfort level.  I wonder if Mary needed some personal space and quiet time away from angels singing, shepherds standing around, and foreign men bringing gifts, that she had no idea what to do with?

Where Artists Go

This is a copy of a photo that Kate did for the opening of the IWU gallery. It was the first piece the gallery sold.  She has a name for it, which I can't recall.  I think it should be labeled "Leap of Faith".  It also reflects the place where artists live... in between. It is a place of neither here nor there, then or now. It is a peaceful place of "1/2 way" where the mind can relax, to listen and create, to let what needs to, come out. When my children were little, and I was the last to come upstairs to bed, I would love to sit on the stairs, just 1/2 way up.... thinking of the day. It was a place of nowhere.... a place of the moment. Our cat would sit with me, waiting.... in the "in between'".

Aunt Stella giving Anesthesia

Really... this is my Great Aunt Stella.

Why aren't they smiling?

My Mother is one of 11 children. She is the girl standing next to her Father, to his left. She is not smiling. Not many are smiling in this photo. The story behind this picture contains a dark secret that no one wants to talk about.  My Mother saw something, that happened to a child who is not in this picture.  He has no grave marker, nor record of his death.  It is like he vanished. 

Family Not Included

Kate Collins Photography

The Wildcat Creek

 Childhood swimming and ice skating creek.

Winter Reflection

This beloved photo was shot by a dear friend of Kate, back in their college days. Please view his epic work @www.dscottclarkphoto.com.  Aside from being brilliant, Scott captured Kate in her element with this photo.  She loves Winter and she loves snow.  This is a beautiful glimpse of her in her Winter world. Kate has always appreciated the colors of Winter time. Stark white, grays, blues, and black are seen in it's unique light that Winter reveals. She sees the elegance of the trees contrasted against the shadows and sky. Most people distain this time of year. It seems purposeless and dismal at best. The cold brings a slowing to life and we all settle into a time of dormancy. I think it is a great time for needed rest, whether we want it or not. The cold reminds us of life's circle... at least here in the Midwest. If we could all approach Winter like Kate, we might accept and maybe even embrace it's special gifts. 

Travel Nursing

"You have to leave the city of your comfort and go into the wilderness of your intuition. What you will find will be wonderful... What you'll discover will be yourself!"  Alan Alda




     A career goal of mine was to try Travel Nursing. Could I do it? Did I know enough to " hit the floor running" as they expect you to do in this unique specialty? When the opportunity was right, I challenged myself to drive across the country to California, accepting a travel position at the prestigious Cedar Sinai Surgery Center in West Hollywood. The contract was for 20 weeks. I loved the experience so much I stayed for 8 months. I met amazing fellow nurses,staff and patients. As a Travel Nurse, you need the armor of experience, resilience, and confidence. I knew I had the experience but learned the resilience as part of the process. The confidence was the gift I gained from taking the risk. I came away a better woman and especially a better nurse.

The girl we all wanted to be.

This is a rare picture of a girl who considered Nursing for a career. It would have been a safe road. A very acceptable and a worthy vocation. But one's destiny can change when we listen to that spirit within. It can start as a faint voice, that grows louder, and if we are lucky, the voice becomes so deafening.... we would be willing to risk dying than to ignore it. This girl listened and risked the ultimate.  She became the heroine that we all wanted to be. She pushed the doors open for the rest of us who were left on the ground.  She didn't settle for Nursing, like I did. She defied the odds and dared to go where it wasn't safe.  She never returned. The rest of us held on to our kite strings, wondering and listening for our inner voice.